yeah, i stole this, but the cuteness was just too much!!

check out the tiny monster. you will dig her work



it has been another long week but as of this morning i am done with all my tedious, stress-inducing, ulcer-creating work. the grant is completed. all problems solved, all numbers reconcilied and, best of all, a check in the friggin' mail. that makes for one sweet friday morning here in the 'ville.
don't get me wrong, though, this morning was full of suprises. first, i awoke to a pitiful "momma" only to be followed by the sound of puke hitting the floor. that was at 5:45 this morning. the puke was over with soon when the poops hit. yes, i have had a grossy-morosey morning. it turns out that dinner last night did not agree with her. and after about 4 trips to the potty and a load of crackers, she was fine.
she went to school and i came to work. no one is here first thing in the morning and that's how i like it. it's the little bit of peace that i get in a day. the rest of the time is filled with me changing hats between mom/wife/office manager/ maid and as of this morning, nurse. back to what i was getting to. it's these times in the morning that i really get to reflect on my life and where it is going. sometimes that isn't a good thing. i wonder if i'm fulfilling myself enough. i've become so busy with taking care of everyone else, that i have given up some of my passions in the process. i miss painting and sewing and beading and playing music. i miss working out and getting to run two miles. i miss a lot of things that i used to do.
here's my question: how do you get to do all those things and not give up on all the others? and don't tell me "you just have to make time" i want to actually know how real people do it. if anyone out there has an idea, post it, please. wishing you all a happy friday.


this is how i feel today

Am I alone in thinking...

that our Miss America is a seriously unattractive woman? am i?


long day

but it's this that makes it all worth while. when i'm tired and they day is long and i wonder if i can go on any more, i know i can because of her. i'm still not out of the woods yet with the grant/job thing and that scares me. all the others can go back to the police departments that they came from but i don't have that. i also don't have my college degree and i don't know that i could find another job that pays as well as this one plus benefits. it's a little much to think about. so, like i said, this is what gets me through when i don't know if i can keep going:

love is a powerful thing.

Happy Hundred Day!

Today is the one hundredth day that my daughter has been in school and this is what we put together. There are 100 cocktail umbrellas surrounding a blue basket, but you can't see the basket because there are so many umbrellas. Needless to say, my daughter is beyond excited about her 100 day project.
So....Happy Hundred Day!!


i'm okay, but, DAMN! this has been one helluva week

first and foremost, thanks to everyone that has been concerned about me this week. usually i would blow off concern like that as being needless, but i needed it this week. thanks, guys, it really means a lot.
tuesday afternoon we got the billing sheet in for the grant!! awesome, right? yes, but major stress inducing for me. my big boss got on the phone and called the attorney general and POOF! we magically got our billing sheet. hmmmm? wonder how that happened.... anyway, i stayed at work supremely late to try and compile three months worth of data in one sitting so that i could send in our reimbursement sheet. not fun. and in the midst of doing that, i discovered that i was missing VITAL information. (this is where i shake my fist in anger at the universe and scream "damn you, damn you all!!!") so i had to put off finishing it until wednesday.
wednesday arrives and i am ready for the world! i get on the phone and call all the right people to get my missing information. and then i wait. and wait. and wait. while i'm waiting not so patiently, my boss is calling me constantly asking me if i have the grant paperwork done yet. finally i get the right stuff and off i go, filling in all the numbers and data so i can get it signed so we can get roughly seventy-five thousand dollars. but wait!! the man that has to sign it is out of town!! this causes more fist shaking. but at least my end is done and the paperwork is just waiting to be signed. on my way back from dropping off said papers, a known drug dealer is leaving his apartment in a giant U-Haul truck. not good. he was just indicted for felony drug sales and now he's trying to skip town. so, i call one of the agents and pass it along. then i get a call back to go find a warrant on the dealer, get in my car and call the agent back. i did and he informs me where to go to meet him. okay, no big deal, right? wrong! i roll up on a scene with about 6 cops, the U-Haul truck and the drug dealer. in five o'clock traffic. my boss never said "hey, we pulled him over and you're bringing the warrant to take his ass down." i was a little bit in awe, but damn was it cool. getting to be on the scene, locking up bad guys! WOOHOO!!
thursday: paperwork is signed and approved!! yeah, now to get it in the mail. but wait? what is this? my boss wants me to take it to the Department of Public Safety, personally?? um, okay but it's a two-hour drive. so i got the option of taking his car or taking my own, either way, i was going. i was pretty cool with that since i needed a break and i got to see my brother. hello brother!! turned the stuff in and was told that there was a holdup in accounting (yes, i've already heard this) and that they couldn't cut us a check just yet. so after all the hell i went through, we still have no money. i'm ready to puke. i call my boss and break the news. he was mad but pulled some strings and got us enough money donated by the county to float us. i don't even want to know what he did for that. i don't care, i'm still employed and that's all that matters.
today: slow day at the start, but then it ended with finding a meth lab, helping in a foot pursuit and dealing with the Federal Bureau of Narcotics. today was nuts but cool. and my husband would shoot me if he knew that i helped catch a purse snatcher today. remember folks, i'm still just a civilian!!
oh and did i mention that during all of this we are moving to a new office, having grand jury in one county, circuit court in another county, i received a court subpoena, my husband's rental house is being vacated (early) and my ex-husband moved back to michigan? oh, yeah, i started my period, too. i'm so glad this week is over. (big, fat sigh of relief...)


tired already

this year has been off to a rocky start. it's been hectic as hell and i've been so stressed out on two occasions that my stomach actually hurt.
and to top it all off, i will be unemployed by friday. the job that i have is funded by a federal grant which was approved in october. but in order for us to get reimbursed by the grant, we have to have federal billing sheets. we haven't gotten any of those since october. so, without those sheets, we are spending money and no one is paying us back.
i'm not the only one that has to go home either. six agents will be unemployed as well and that really, really sucks. the department of public safety swears that i will get a billing sheet this week so that i can turn in my reimburesement info, but i'm not holding my breath. "there's a holdup in accounting" is not good enough anymore.
if any of you reading this are religious, say a prayer. if you aren't, wish us luck.


I got tagged!!

My pal Miss 1999 and her alter ego Chloe tagged me!! Simple rules: write an entry about five weirdnessess that you posses and then name five people that have to do the same. post on their site letting them know that they have been tagged! so, here goes nothing:

1. I have mild O.C.D., so everything on my desk at work has to be even with the edges of the desk and the papers they are relative to.

2. I am a "smoker snob" and will only smoke one brand of cigarettes and they must be in a hard pack. ( you're not alone in that one, Chloe!)

3. I still have my childhood blankie and when I'm really sad, I cry on it.

4. I have a genius I.Q. but often act like I don't. Sometimes, it's easier to be the funny, sarcastic one.

5. I still wish that after all my knee surgeries the doctors really did make me bionic.

SO! there are my five oddities. and here my my victims!!


yo've been tagged!!!!